Showing posts with label weekend. Show all posts
Weekend Trio
Spicy Walnuts
First weekend, just us three. It's only 2 days. I can't imagine anything like a year but there it is, a very real possibility.
K's baseball class in Chester was uneventful - neither good or bad, just costing me money. He usually does well but grew bored very quickly of the warm-ups, bean-bag tossing and running bases.
The weather is rainy and cold, very windy too. Honestly I like it. Love the smell, the freshness of it. At Jamie's house, she called it gross, said that it was just so gross outside and I'm thinking I love it all the more for being the non-favorite.
While driving there, I missed my turn off the main road. Pulled into a restaurant drive-way to turn-around and was immediately faced with a car slowly approaching in reverse. The driver was about to hit me until I honked. As I pulled away, Bebe said, "He needs to eat more carrots, Mom!" Now that made me laugh, both of these babies are funny.
Bobey has done wonderfully all weekend, I can tell he's forlorn and misses Drew. We all do. He's sat by the front door on more than occasion simply waiting out the hours. As I am too no doubt, busying myself with all things household and the unsurmountable piles of laundry. But I'm doing it, all the while wondering what it would be like to be like this for a year. I don't want to think about it.
We'll be stateside for almost 9 months now. All these changes have been difficult, challenging and the rate of chaos has me anticipating yet another. I can deal with anything: relocations, insane expenses, burying a family pet, a family member, a flood of family members for the holidays, a flood of water, and even a flood of work-related frustration. A year long deployment, no I don't know about that. Just can't see myself without Drew. Don't know but I know there's no sense in not trying. I'd do anything.
Another Night, Another Saturday
Softball games from the early morning 'til evening. Only I wasn't there; the babies and I stayed home. We slept in, woke for cereal and Saturday morning cartoons. Coffee in the am and cold air rushing in through the open windows of our house. Smells of earth. Too cold not to wear socks.
Since my two children don't get TV Monday - Thursday, they get free reign come Saturday morning. We watched NickJr until the afternoon then headed for the park. I minded it; I really didn't want to go but hey, that's what Mom's do right? It was cold and the grounds were still a little muddy. My boots sunk into the ground as I followed them around from slide to see-saw. With the promise of hot cocoa we finally made it home.
No, not a spectacular Saturday but still good; spending time with my babies is always good. They're funny, challenging and genuinely amazing individuals. Sometimes I wish we had another child but realistically two children are just fine. It's expensive raising a family! And always looming on the horizon is the cost of college, is the dispersement of wealth, is the legacy of what I will be able to leave behind for them. I want to give my two everything I have. Selfish maybe, but I want not to dilute what I have accumulated so far in my life for them.
Having another child is not something I constantly think about but there are those few moments when I wish for another baby Andrew. That's just about the moment that I am jolted back into reality by the mortgage, the bills, the college savings and the responsibility of being a responsible working mom and I know it is just not an option. I think we are doing right; making the right choice for both ourselves and our children.
